One week in Ensenada

What an amazing week. Our new teacher is a Korean woman named Soo Lee she is so beautiful and kind and the lecture topic is focused on inner healing. I have experienced this a little when I was in my discipleship training school. It was an excellent time for me to identify the issues I had been struggling with. SooLee has been doing various exercises to help us gain an understanding of the hurt areas of our lives. We have been talking about forgiveness towards ourselves and towards others. One day we were asked to draw a tree, then we were asked to change the tree so it represents us. My tree had many holes in the bark along with many of small leaves all individually drawn. SooLee thought a lot about my picture but the basics were, that the holes were places I needed to let the lord into, places healing needed to come to, and the leaves were a representation of my future. I have so many desires, I have several career path interest, I have so many places I want to visit, I have so many people I want to spend time with and be a blessing too. I Honestly have so many dreams I don’t know where to begin. I am excited to see the places God will take me especially in the next 5 years to come.

We have also been speaking a lot about realizing the roots of our struggles. SooLee gave a great example of having to get to the source of our addictions. She has a thorn bush growing in her yard. So she cut off the branches and most of the tree, but a few days later it came back. So she went back out cut it down and then began to dig. She made a huge hole in her hard pulling up all the roots until she had to stop because the thorn bush was coming from a neighbor’s yard. Our sin and addictions works the same way. Many of you know that in the past I suffered from and purging my meals when I would eat to much. I desperately wanted control in my life and controlling food was an easy way to feel like I was in charge. On my discipleship training school God allowed me to conquer that sin It has been a long time since I have done that and I believe that the power of God has kept me healthy. But something I am realizing here is that I really deeply struggle with self confidence and being comfortable with myself.

So to relate this to SooLee’s teaching… the purging is the branches and trunk of the tree. It is the clear representation of my sin and hurt. It is visible, but what I am learning now is that the purging came out of self confidence roots. With God’s divine love and faithful teachers like SooLee I hope to further look into these roots and really remove this habit of self hatred from my lifestyle.

I am also realizing new weaknesses in my life. I sometimes try to play God especially in my family. I so desperately want them on the right path, or what I think is right. I try and give my opinion way too often and it comes across as judgment. I am learning to surrender the people I love, and that maybe I want to do something that is good but it is not the right timing. I want to speak at the Holy Spirits prompting not just hand out my own advice all the time.

In other news, my back is almost 100% I am able to do almost all my dances. It has been really interesting seeing life from the non physical I was forced to be in bed when I wanted so badly to participate but just as God told Daivd he was not to build the temple, I was told those projects were not for me to dance in. There is a time for everything as the bible says in Ecclesiastes chapter 3….


There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

I am learning so much about when and how to do things in life. I pray that this maturity would continue in the life of my classmates and me.
Outreach!!!!! So we are leaving next weekend. We have fun into some financial issues with other students but we are praying for God’s work to be done in last minute fundraising. It is really hard to believe that lecture is coming to an end! I am so thrilled for the adventure of outreach and the times of ministry and teaching ahead. Please be praying for our safety and team unity.

Thank you again for all of those reading, praying, and supporting. This has been a very intense journey and I look forward to the growing to come in outreach.
It is starting to warm up here in Ensenada and we have been able to walk on the beach during the weekends when we finish our homework. I walked the other day with my good friend Chanmin. She is a peppy hilarious Korean girl. Please pray for her both of her parents tragically past away a few years ago and she is battling with a tremendous fear of man. She feels it is too difficult to create dance pieces here. Join with me in prayer for her and for her to receive freedom from this spiritual bondage.